A common thread weaves its way through my heart in the space of waiting. One that is not yet familiar, but needs to become the thread that binds me closer with God.

A fabric with two threads manifests itself in the recesses of my mind. The faint fibers of these needs starts swishing, as whispers begging to be heard, with hidden answers to draw me closer into God’s arms.

space of waiting

I live in a space of waiting that feels frustrating, overwhelming, long, and uncertain all at the same time. Impatience walks me through my days and I create more chaos than stillness. I wrote about silence last week and know it is a work in progress that I have not mastered. I am learning that a quiet mind provides a space for God to enter and when I do not choose this, I have left Him out. We invite God into the quiet and His presence makes us whole.

As God’s whispers reach my heart, I hear a call to rest and surrender. Both go against my usual modus of operandi, in that I am not good at either one. But good is not what I need to be. Open to learning and embracing is where I need to center myself.

I’m in a season of transition that looks like everything and nothing all at the same time. My heart and mind desire to stay busy because the world’s expectations demand a hurried busyness. I pull against the world in a constant battle of me versus it. Somedays, I find I am losing, but all days I hear another plea that goes straight into my heart. A cry to slow down, be still and rest.

Rest is not just a physical act that we intentionally indulge in each day. Rest is a freeing of our heart and mind. Am emptying of ourselves from ourself. A time to restore, heal and renew. Rest is the simple invitation for God to be present in our day and carry us through the night. Rest is the gift that God creates when we need Him to heal our brokenness with His grace and love.

God calls us to rest. God needs our whole heart, mind and body to function well as His child. His renewal is the salve for our weary souls.

Even youths shall faint and be weary,
and young men shall fall exhausted;
31 but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength;
they shall mount up with wings like eagles;
they shall run and not be weary;
they shall walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:30-31

But in this time of rest, God calls us to more. The complete emptying of ourselves to Him is the other piece to the puzzle that He is carefully crafting, one piece at a time. Surrender is the missing piece. Freeing ourselves of our junk, our messiness, and our burdens, is surrendering it all to Jesus. It is abandoning what the world holds dear and instead taking up the cross of Jesus, where we find the perfect surrender.

In the space of waiting, God knows what I need. Submitting myself to Him through a time of rest is how He will restore the balance and focus needed to move forward with what’s next. When I let go of my agenda, God will find the space to join me in the quiet. His presence, healing and grace will teach me and carry me toward His great plan.

So if you are wondering what I am doing in retirement, here is my answer. I am in a time of transition led by God. He knows I need rest and the chance to surrender all to make room not only for Him, but for what He has planned next for me. I am not following the world’s norms of staying busy, but I am opening my heart to hearing well, listening and following Jesus into my next!

May we surrender all to God as we seek to heal, restore and rest in His presence!

In grace and peace,

Mary

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